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Assalamualaikum..here my heart says..

you don't want to think about it..
but that's the only thing in your mind.
you said you don't want to see them..
but every second,the longing is killing you..
you said you hate them..
but your heart scream out loud you love that person.
you said you'll be okay if they walk away..
but you can't even imagine that moment.
you said 'i'm happy as long as you're happy..
'even if you're gone,ill eat,live and laugh happily like always..
but why the tears keep crawling on my cheeks..
those words all lies,you know it..
but even if i know it,do i have any other choice?..

the warmth from the love breeze..
make my heart frozen to death..
that words..
'i'll never fall in love again..
'i'll never get hurt by love again..
'i'll never believe in love again..
even after millions time i've repeated them..
this foolish heart wont understand..
they get hurt again..
they cry again..

there's so many things to talk..
but they all locked up in my heart..
if i said that,will he feels sad..
if i said that,will he feels guilty..
if i said that,will he feels happy..
is he busy?..
is he talking to his friends right now?
am i interrupting him?
i keep thinking about it,again and again.
after all,those unspeakable words
left here,in my heart

if i stay,will he love me,will he hate me?
if i walk away,will he hate me,will he love me?

love is weird

they call it love,
but what left is pain..
and i'm here thinking
'am i in love,or am i in pain?'..

thats what i'm thinking...thats what i feels before..for who i love before...even we're in different situation..or different feels now..even all of this our ol'story....but its still running in my mind...
and now...he deserve to someone better...

am i in pain??am i happy for them??

[End_20042011]
An Nisa

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